Thursday, 23 June 2011

Another Day

Well here we are again, and happily today was about 150% better than yesterday. Thanks for all your lovely messages - most of them on The Book I see but that is fine - commenting on an actual blog does seem to be more complicated with the need for an account and everything. I hope you don't mind me asking for comments btw - I think it is something to do with this feeling that if you don't get feedback no one is listening, or interesting, or cares. Which is probably me being paranoid as of course I know that I have lots of good friends - if you are reading this then that includes you - who are sending prayers, good wishes and positive vibes my way. Thank you. And please forgive my craving for some kind of response.

Moving on... or back for a moment. I meant to write about a couple of lovely things that happened yesterday. One in particular. I forgot, but it is not too late so here we go...

After the tube journey back to the office yesterday I was feeling a bit rubbish. That's not unusual when you have travelled on the Jubilee Line but yesterday particularly so. Everything Mr Tucker had said was swimming round in my head and I was wondering who I would bump into first on arrival in Lower Marsh. I'd have put money on me bursting into tears the first time someone said "alright...?" which seems to be the 21st century equivalent of "good afternoon..."

There must be at least a couple of hundred people in the Christian Aid office on any given day. Allowing for those on holiday, off sick, taking flexi or, this week, simply watching Wimbledon - sorry, working from home (!)

But who was the very first person to come out of the office - heading to the postbox? Well I won't name him here to spare his blushes but a very lovely colleague whose wife happens to have had the same surgery for scoliosis that I had last year. Quite a coincidence, and a very lovely one as yes I did cry but yes he gave me a hug and yes he took me into the local cafe for a cuppa. Nice.

And nicer still, in came the colleague who organises our staff prayer meetings, who I was just thinking of writing to. Prayer's a funny old thing - sometimes when I feel a bit better I put it down to people praying, then it gets worse again and I wonder if they stopped. Sometimes if it gets a bit better I wonder why it can't be completely better. And sometimes I think if it really does work and all those people are praying for the Middle East.... and then I think maybe best not to think like that as it doesn't help anyone. What does help - hugely - is the knowledge that people are praying. And that knowledge in itself helps me cope. So it works.

So - back to today. A much better one. Interviewing lovely people with lovely colleagues, then a meeting that ended up in the pub with chips and a glass of wine. Home, a hot bath and an early night - up early to try and get those Olympic tickets!

Plan has to be to take one step at a time. No rush to do anything drastic too soon. CT scan first to try and pinpoint any pseudarthrosis, and if there is none a decision re removing the metalwork. Funny how attached I feel to it now - the thought of having it removed is not one I particularly enjoy. There's a certain reassurance in knowing the scaffolding is there to hold everything in place and I think I would worry that without it my spine might start to curve again. Pain or no pain I like being able to breathe more easily, and I love wearing dresses :-)

That's it for now - off for a weekend away to celebrate our 30th Wedding Anniversary. And being the ageing rockers that we are it will be spent at one of the biggest summer festivals! No, not Glastonbury, Hard Rock Calling! With accommodation in a luxury hotel adjacent to Hyde Park, soft beds and showers! We'll see Kaiser Chiefs, The Killers and Bon Jovi - bound to take anyone's mind off a spot of pain - especially if we share enough champagne!

Thanks for listening and speak again soon.

Linda xxx

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