I hesitated before writing that subject line. Wondering if perhaps I should first copyright it. Someone said to me today that it would be a great name for "my business" and I've been holding that thought ever since.
Reason I came up with it? That same person (you know who you are - thanks!) asked me a couple of questions about what I want to do in my working life and what I need to learn from this situation. In the midst of the stuff about flexibility, working from home, being my own boss, managing staff; and alongside the angst about whether I am actually not very good, or not as good as people kindly tell me I am, not as good as I was led to believe, or not as good as I had managed to convince myself I might be during those long months of rehab, three little words found their way onto the virtual paper. Write. Bake. Create.
I used to think I enjoyed writing. More recently it's become what I do and I've come to realise that a lot of the time the enjoyment comes only after its finished. There's something in the challenge, as you craft random thoughts into sentences and paragraphs, build a description, an argument, a report, that is akin to excitment - perhaps even enjoyment. But wrestling restrictive wordcounts, phrasing things in a way that will engage and hold the readers interest, making them smile, or respond in some other way, then releasing something so personal into the ether for others to catch and comment upon is a scary risky business and "enjoy" isn't necessarily the best word to describe it. But if it's what you do - who you are even - then you have no choice as if the words don't find their way out they continue spinning round and round in your head, begging to be listened to...
Baking is something else. Sieving flour, creaming butter and sugar, whisking eggs and releasing the essence of pure vanilla into the feather light misture is pure joy. Spooning the resulting mixture into beautifully crafted cupcake cases and then watching as, in the heat of the rangemaster, it rises into perfect peaks of soft sponge is like watching a miracle occur before your very eyes! And then the opportunity to unleash your creativity in decorating them with soft fondant, fresh buttercream and frosting - what's not to love?
When it comes to how to earn a living yet another idea is bubbling and brewing away. Something to combine blogging, books and baking in a cauldron of creativity - watch this space!
photo: victoria sponge baked by Sarah Anderson - must be in the genes ;-)